For many of us, making friends in later life, and
particularly after we retire, can prove a challenge. It isn’t necessarily
very easy to do but, on the other hand, it’s something that is important as
we get older.
Having friends helps us to keep mentally fit and even, to a certain extent,
physically fit in that we are likely to do various activities if we have
someone to do them with. It also gives us an outward, rather than an inward,
view of the world, thereby helping us to take an active interest in things,
from politics to the state of our local football team.
Having hobbies may help you to meet people, form relationships and make
friends. However, some hobbies are, on the face of it, relatively solitary
activities and if we find making friends difficult, we might choose
activities that we can do on our own. However, with almost everything, in
all aspects of our life, there is a way that can help us to meet people.
Below is a list of examples; if you can think of some more please put them
on the laterlife café forum which is part of the Later Lifestyle
Social Network. So, if you enjoy:
· Reading – join a book club or
reading group in which everyone reads the same book for a month
and then meets to discuss it before getting a new book to read the following
month
· Walking - join a group such as The
Ramblers Association . There is also the
Walking the Way to Health Initiative .
This has over 350 walk schemes in its database, so there is one near you.
Have a look on the link and check it out. walking in a group is an excellent
way to meet people.
· Sport – join a club. If you want some fairly gentle exercise, join a bowls club (link). They are very
sociable and welcoming organisations. If you like cycling or football or any
other sport but you feel you’re too old to play, join a club on the
administrative side – you’ll be welcomed with open arms! If you want to keep
fit but don’t like sports, join a gym. It’s not all grunting and groaning –
there is also a lot of talking and chatting going on, too.
· Dogs – if you like dogs, get one and take it for a walk. Complete
strangers, who wouldn’t dream of talking to each other if they walked past
each other in the street or on a country path do chat if there are dogs
involved. From there it’s quite common to form firm friendships
· Cards – play something other than patience. Learn to play bridge and join
a bridge
club so that you can meet people whilst indulging your love of cards.
· Gardening – instead of, or as well as, gardening at home, get an allotment
and chat with your fellow allotment holders over a spade or a fork.
· Hobbies – whatever your hobby, there will be a body that oversees it in
some ways. It’s worth joining this organisation because it will almost
certainly organise events, weekends etc at which you will meet like-minded
people.
· Holidays. If you are on your own, holidays can prove a daunting prospect.
If you are an outward-going sort of person, going away alone and meeting
people may not be a problem. However, for some people it is really
difficult. SAGA
encourages single people by not charging single-room supplements on any of
their UK and many of their overseas holidays. There are a number of
organisations that help you find holiday companions;
5star-travels.co.uk shows you the best of them. Have a look at Single Living .
· Romance. Look at the links below to our dating pages to find out how to
meet members of the opposite sex.
Some hobbies and pastimes will, by their very nature, involve meeting
people. Activities such as golf and dancing spring to mind and there are
hundreds more. If you like these activities, then meeting people will not be
a problem for you.
However, if your preference is not one of these activities, think of ways in
which you can enable your favourite pastime to help you meet people or take
up an extra hobby that involves other people. After all, you’re guaranteed
to meet people who like the same thing as you so there’s a good chance you
will get on well with them. Have a look at our
Hobbies and Interests link if you want some ideas for hobbies.
Remember, too, that activities such as being involved with voluntary work
and undertaking some sort of continuing education can also be excellent ways
of meeting people. Of course, that is not their primary purpose but it can
be a very good by-product of these things. Again, though, think about the
type of activity you undertake if you do want to meet people: doing an Open
University degree may not be the ideal way to make new friends (although
through tutor groups and summer school it’s not impossible).
For more ideas and help, read our Guide to Forming Friendships, which will help you with more thoughts and ideas about how to go about increasing your social network.
Meeting new people and making friends is important as we get older. However,
sometimes we have to make an effort to do it: people don’t suddenly
materialise from thin air. Thinking creatively about doing so will make the
job easier and will enable you to make new friends in later life.
Below are more links to services that help you to meet people of similar interests and ages, or find a partner
through the internet dating services. If you would like to talk with more laterlifers, why
not visit the laterlife Cafe which is part of the
Later Lifestyle
Social Network and join in
the conversation.
The leading Dating
and Introduction service in the UK.
Dateline
Platinum
(incorporating Club Sirius) (founded in
1992) is a development of the original Dateline
service (founded in 1966)They don't just provide Dating and Introduction services for the over 50s, but with the
largest Dating & Introduction membership in the UK they provide the greatest
opportunity for meeting a friend or partner within the age range you specify, somewhere
near you. |
