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My fight with the spiders

My fight with the spiders

Rosemary Martin confesses to a massacre

It`s the time of year

when those enormous spiders with long legs come in from wherever they have spent the last few months. I know in my heart of hearts they won`t hurt me and are more afraid of me than I am of them, but the fact remains - they terrify me.

I can cope with spiders fairly well during the day, after all they are easy to stamp on when wearing shoes  (and no, I don’t feel guilty about this).  But I feel vulnerable in bed at night. My husband, a spider lover, removes those he finds, by cupping them in his hands and, whilst talking to them, gently puts them back in the garden, out of the way of my size 7`s.

  

 

But I’m not deceived. I know full well that there are plenty left in the house, and they are waiting until I am undressed and in bed before they start scuttling around the bedroom, playing tag with each other, and havoc with my nerves.

They are out to get me  (I’m not paranoid, am I?) Recently, I have killed four rat-sized spiders in my bedroom, splattering them unmercifully with a shoe kept specifically for the job. The final straw came in the early hours a few nights ago, when I switched on my bedside light, and was confronted by an enormous spider only inches away from my face on the bedside table, and obviously up to no good. I swear he was grinning at me...

I realised the spiders were winning, and decided they were not going to further intimidate me. I armed myself with some weapons - a pocket torch, so I could catch them unawares, and a spray which claims to kill all things creepy, including spiders.

And then I set about eliminating the beasties.

The instructions on the insecticide said to spray all entrances and places where spiders lurk, so I have sprayed all around the windows and the French doors, including the balcony area. I have also sprayed the door threshold - in case they come from other rooms to visit, under the bed where I know they lie in wait, and behind and on top of the wardrobe fitments. I shall either sleep peacefully in the knowledge that I have killed my enemy, or have breathing difficulties due to the fumes....

Of course, there is a drawback. Being a slow-release insecticide, with effects lasting for up to three months, I won`t be able to do any housework for a while.  Damn.

 


 

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