How to Avoid being a Grumpy Old Bore
 It’s something we all heartily dislike in
some people as they get older - the way they get set in their ways and go on about
things being different in their day. No, it’s certainly not going to happen to us, we
tell ourselves.
But maybe at times we find ourselves shaking our heads in
bewilderment when we encounter or read about young women and men urinating in the street,
getting drunk or abusive or showing no consideration for older or less able citizens. What
is the world coming to, we may find ourselves asking.
And quick as a flash, we begin to see that our attempt to hold on to
reasonable standards of behaviour carries all the hallmarks of the Grumpy Old Bore (or
to abbreviate, the GOB). How do we maintain one without turning into the other? I’ve
come to the conclusion that a lot of it is to do not with what we say but how we say it.
The GOB expressions to avoid are ‘People never did that in my
day’ … ‘What is the world coming to?’… ‘The country’s
going to the dogs’… and others of that ilk. There’s more mileage, and more
insight, to be gained through talking to younger people (especially the ones who
don’t go in for anti-social behaviour). Only the GOB makes blanket condemnations
without thinking about what’s going on in society first.
There’s a good reason for this - and it’s a mix of feeling
threatened and mental laziness. Change is always a bit threatening, and it demands a
mental effort. As we get older, the effort can get too much. Like unused muscles,
unquestioned attitudes harden into inflexibility. So, the GOB never attempts to listen to
contemporary music or contemplate modern art, but dismisses them as ‘a load of old
rubbish’. When a new take on an old, controversial topic is in the air, the GOB
grumbles with talk of ‘been there, done that’.
The antidote is all too obvious: as we get older we need to cultivate
an open mind. We can avoid the been-there-done-that mentality by seeking
new experiences. Or go one step further and think in terms of giving something back to
society, perhaps working for the environment or some other cause we actually care about.
 That way, we help make the world a better place and
contribute to a raising of standards. And the nice thing is that we are doing it
for our children and our grandchildren, and everyone else’s children and
grandchildren too. What’s more, we’ve a good chance of being remembered with
love and respect rather than being considered a GOB.
This later life….
Latest on longer life and longer
health…
Figures
for Great Britain, 1999 issued by
National Statistics www.statistics.gov.uk
‘Age may just be an attitude,
but in the end it takes its toll in blood and bone…
I don’t want to be 95 and living in an old people’s home with no memory. I think voluntary euthanasia is an excellent
programme.’
Novelist
Margaret Drabble, aged 63, quoted in The Times
‘Granny leaves husband for lover aged
22’
headline
in London’s Evening Standard
The ‘Granny’ was
60-year-old Syliva Ouhtit, who divorced her husband after 38 years of marriage to marry a
young Moroccan she is said to have met on the internet.
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