| Hi, I’m Helen – your host on talkback. Like you,
I have fifty-plus interests which make for a varied lifestyle. Mine include a husband,
three grown-up children, two sons-in-law, four grandchildren and a father aged 97. I do
some charity work, enjoy walking in the country (hills, but not mountains), go to the gym,
attend yoga classes and a wonderful jazz dance class in which you forget the aerobic
effort as you exercise along to Old Blue Eyes. That’s as well as writing on health
issues. The novel will have to wait |
| Talkback 9
WHY DO WOMEN LIE ABOUT THEIR AGE?
 It's
not only women of course. We live in such a youth-conscious, age-prejudiced society, that
men, too, are ready to knock a few years off their age if they think it will get them a
job or make a better impression (perhaps with younger women). But traditionally, women
have the edge when it comes to being liberal with the truth about their age.
I'm not condoning the practice, but I believe they have good reason. Despite greater
equality, more opportunities and all that so-called girl power, we still live in an
incredibly ageist/sexist society. Young women - ie women with the bodies of girls - flaunt
their impossible beauty, reminding those of us who are fatter and also older of what we
never can be and may never have been.
The world worships the thin and the young. Beautiful, unlined faces appear on our
television screens, on posters, in the cinema, in magazines and newspapers. Designers
concoct fantasy creations to be displayed on their perfect bodies. High Street fashion
follows with similarly 'unforgiving' clothes. Such a giveaway, that word, suggesting that
we have to be forgiven for our imperfections and are likely to be ashamed of ageing.
Anyone who lies about their age is, to some degree, ashamed. It's not because they are
coy or vain or shallow, it's because in some way they feel that their age is not
acceptable. When Gloria Steinem, the American feminist, announced to the world that she
was fifty, some reporters said, 'You don't look your age.' To which she replied firmly,
'This is what fifty looks like', a phrase echoed by Anita Roddick of the Body Shop more
recently.
Easy for the famous to be so upfront - is that what you're thinking? If that's really so,
how come that famous actresses are so often revealed to have been liberal with the truth
about their birthdays when their obituaries are published? These are women whose fame
depends acutely on their looks. To be that famous, that had to be that beautiful.
It's a fact that we worship beauty. When we see it we sense it satisfies some deep
aesthetic need. But our times of mass communication, the close-up camera, the wide screen
have given it too much prominence. We expect to look and to judge.
How often do you judge someone by their age, either from their appearance or through
verbal description - 'An elderly couple'…'A pensioner'.. 'A grey-haired grandmother
of three'… We're all guilty at times of stereotyping, seeing the age rather than the
individual. And knowing that we do it means that we know we're getting a similar treatment
from others.
That's why women lie about their age.
What do you think? email me at talkback - helen@laterlife.com
|
Talkback is a regular
feature in laterlife.com run by journalist and author Helen Franks. 
